Your experience colors your response to this. (And isn’t that true of us all?)

I read your story, Evan Bond, and I get where you’re coming from. I know Sharon Hurley Hall, and I get where she’s coming from, too. So before getting too defensive over this, consider (as you suggested) the pattern of behavior, the invariable tone of voice used, and how it would feel to be on the receiving end of some of the things described in this story. Consider that the author’s experience is a lived one, for many, many people, every day.

It’s not that your intentions or my intentions are bad or rude or racist — it’s that sometimes, they’re just thoughtless and habitual holdovers of the racist norms of a society where it’s been perfectly acceptable to treat people differently based on the physical characteristics they’re born with. Skin color. Eye shape. Hair texture. And they’re exhausted, tired of it, and very well in tune with it — whether you and I are, or not.

In your story, you’re doing your job. Perhaps there’s an unfair prejudicial assumption against you for being a security guard. So you should get it. And I don’t blame you for wanting a 5 minute cooling off period to consider your intentions — but don’t be too defensive when people who’ve been waiting a lifetime for that same grace, that same presumption from the dominant white culture, that they are worthy of kindness and respect until it’s proven otherwise, for their patience wearing really thin, really fast.

We’d all do well to listen, and to remember that just because we don’t share experiences and don’t see some things as a problem does not mean that those things are not a problem that others live with every day.