Well, this is a new one! And thought-provoking. Maybe...

I wonder how much of this is influenced by other family dynamics in the background - the amount of "control" exerted by the parents of the bride (soon to be in-laws of the groom), traditionally (in the U.S.) the ones footing the bill for the wedding, vs. support for the sort of wedding the couple wants and their ability to set appropriate boundaries even before the wedding. Or how much media "influences" the couple's (again, maybe mostly the bride's) choices in what constitutes "the perfect wedding." Is it meant to be perfectly personal and perfect-for-them, or is it meant to be the perfect display and facade or extravaganza to show off or impress or live up to others' expectations? My husband and I have been married 38 years. We started out planning a year in advance, then decided not to wait. We got married on my parents' 22nd anniversary - 12 days from the day we set the date! We had a formal home wedding - even had announcements and a bridal photo in the newspaper - the only thing there wasn't time for was engraved invitations. I was ill at the time; my husband and my grandmother went "shopping" together to fill out the gift registry! People couldn't believe I "let" my husband pick our crystal, china, and home furnishings. I laughed - how could I say he didn't have impeccable taste when he chose ME to be his wife? We freaked out the photographer, who sought out my mom before the wedding - worried about my mental state because he had never seen a bride so CALM right before her wedding. (My mom and I got a good laugh over that one. She told him to have a glass of champagne and chill out, later - he was worried about losing the light and we were enjoying our reception too much to leave before the sun went down.) But seriously, I do think that family dynamics and social influence are on display at a wedding - you're clearly onto something.